In Hollywood, Child Rape is OK

As long as you've made "classic" films like "The Pianist".

Because, you know, everybody loves little girls.

Apparently, when the Church was hit with the gay / pedophile priest scandal some years back, the proper solution was to give the few offending priests some film training and set them loose on the indie circuit.

Hell, practically everybody in Hollywood says its OK to rape children. Why can't you? (Woody Allen? Seriously?)

Disgusting. There's a reason "artists" are not taken seriously anymore. Even notorious celebrity worshipers like the French are getting a clue.

Not that Philippine cinema is any better. We have our own Polanski wannabes.* Except that, its not exactly little girls that they're after. More of little...you know what I mean. As if that makes it any better. 

Art will not change the world. Not with artists like these.

*Yeah, I know the link is a "blind" item. But it doesn't take much to figure out who it is. And it's hardly unbelievable either.

This is Multiply's version of Twitter? Hmmm... Half-baked brain farts, here I come!

Underestimating a Storm

I remember thinking, in the midst of blackout frustrations and general disconnection from the rest of the world, that this storm Ondyong wasn't so bad. Sure, there was a lot of rain, but we don't measure the strength of a storm on rain; rather, we measure the strength of the wind.

This storm had few winds. Nothing was blowing about, no trees looked to be uprooted. I could honestly say then that I had seen worse storms. I was even able to walk to Robinson's Pioneer with no gear more storm-worthy than an umbrella. I had no idea it was this bad.

My first clue was the fact that the blackout was so long. Even during the last super typhoon, power was restored to us a mere five hours after the lights went out. Last Saturday, even the mall was closing down early because, I suspect, they could not keep the entire mall running on generators for long. Even the cinemas closed at 5 pm. We only got power back at midnight, much to my frustration.

Then, the next day, for the first time that I can recall, I had people texting me asking if I was okay. This has never happened before, not even during those stronger storms. I found it odd that people were so worried considering that the storm was relatively weak save for rain volume. I looked out, and the streets did not have the tell-tale signs of a bad storm; no debris strewn all over the streets, no trees on the roads, no broken power cables. So, I didn't join in the general texting frenzy.

Then, I saw the news. The rain volume was damaging in other ways. Apparently, so many places got flooded, especially along river banks. Some of my friends had houses and furniture swept away. We haven't heard so far from AG and TJ, who both live in flash-flooded Cainta. No wonder there was a feeling of panic. I cannot help but think that this is cruel irony...more trouble generated by a weak storm than by monster hurricanes with blasting wind speeds.

I get the feeling that somehow, we the people are to blame for this. It was more a prolonged rain storm than a hurricane, and yet we were caught so unprepared. I hope to God we can bounce back from this. We bounced back from the super typhoon. We can bounce back from this, and the other two storms on her heels.

To all you out there dispossessed and distraught by the unexpected terror of the storm, Godspeed and may the angels in Heaven hear your cry. We are all lamenting now.

Standing Up to the Post-Colonial Narrative

A breath of fresh air! Finally, someone to publicly claim that Montezuma, far from the mewling peacenik unicorn created by the fevered imaginations of post-colonial revisionists, was a bloodthirsty monster who ruled Central Mexico with an iron fist.

There was a reason Cortez managed to get so many natives to join him, and why, despite both meager numbers and reputed brutality, the Spaniards managed to stay in Mexico for almost 300 years. The Spaniards did not just bring small pox and brutality. They brought a lot of things that improved the lot in life of many tribesmen, not least of which is the liberation from the rule of an empire of blood.

Yup...

Abstaining Voter # 2

So, what have we learned from this week's edition of the Philippine electoral circus?

The current administration's best bets are opposition candidates. In this case, Villar and Escudero.

Of course, they'll still field two lifeless dummies in Gibo and Puno (sounds like a comedy troupe), just for the sake of fielding anybody. Of course, only an abject moron expects the two stooges to put up a fight, much less win. They're like Bambi in the award-winning "Godzilla vs. Bambi".

All this means is that the administration has likely already secured the loyalties of Villar and Escudero, with poor Gibo acting as as a smokescreen.

In essence, all candidates in this mess are "opposition". Gibo is no more a candidate than a show pony is a race horse.

Looks like the Inquirer's wet dream. A one party system composed of nothing but opposition. It's like if China decided to lose its mind.

***

Of course, the media hype machine is in full celebration of the gay wedding political teaming of Noynoy "Mama's Boy" Aquino and Mar "Pedicab" Roxas II. (Nothing reveals pretensions to entitlement more than the use of "II". It also sounds like a sequel. Mar Roxas II: This Time, It's Personal...)

But what I'd like to focus on is the funny notion, fielded by number 2 above, that this next election is about "good" and "evil". What makes it even funnier is that Roxas believes that his side is the one that is "good"! Oh, Mar, you joker, you! But then again, he may be serious. This sort of comic book logic, in the nuthouse environment of Philippine politics, may symbolize the apotheosis of Mar Roxas' reasoning skills.

What makes all this a big joke?

First, since when is any party in this clusterfuck of an election "good"?

Second, what does he mean by "good"?

One gets the sense that he mostly means "anybody on our side" is good. But even that is unspecific.

Does he mean, only Liberal Party members are good?

Evil baby! Where's your Liberal Party membership card?

Or, does he mean that those who don't vote for opposition candidates are evil?

He was opposition too. So he must be okay.

Maybe "good" is a question of "good governance"? "Efficiency"?

Kept the trains running on time. Never took a bribe. Perfect.

Or does he simply mean that the "good" are those that are not corrupt, like a certain outgoing President...

Umm...where are these "good guys" again? Oh, it's just an empty void...

You see, there seems to be a screw loose in the understanding of "good" and "evil" held by the good Senator.

Let me demonstrate via comparison:

Churchill calling the war between the Allies and the Nazis "good vs. evil"? Yes.

Roxas calling an election contested by sleazy, posturing oligarchs "good vs. evil"? No.

Look, Senator, just because your future wife's "hot" (I guess...) does not make you Han Solo. Just ask Anakin Skywalker.

Nobody's clean here. Not even you.

Random Thoughts on the Week at Large 9.20.09

Got to watch a really good play this week. OK, half a good play. And for free too. I get to watch the full show for free too in exchange for a longer review. If only I could make a living out of it. Or a reasonable sideline.

***

Apparently, Mar Roxas thinks he and Noynoy are in a "good vs. evil" fight in the upcoming elections. So, will he an Noynoy assemble (form feet and legs! form arms and body!) into a clunky robot to fight Gloriazilla? Tsk tsk, looks like somebody was absent during his theology class. "Good" and "evil" are morally heavy terms that cannot be bandied lightly, especially by specious politicians whose records do not belie any insightful knowledge that would justify their usage. Nobody has the right to use these terms in Philippine politics. Not this lot of mediocrities. Of course, Randy David takes Mar to task, but his approach is that of a woolly agnostic. (Surprise, surprise...) Talk about taking out a fire by collapsing a building on it.

***

This "anybody not in the Liberal Party is evil" approach by Mar Roxas may be one big joke. But if the electorate believes it, then it gets to be really funny. Because by then, the big joke is all of us. "Abstaining Voter" returns on Monday.

***

MSI's service center ought to really rethink their inefficient protocols. If their damn protocols were anywhere near reasonable, I wouldn't have had to wait four days to find out that my laptop had "no problems". (Not...)

***

I love baptismal receptions. I also love drinking at baptismal receptions.

***

When does a "Foodarama" graduate to "Strip Mall"?

***

Bok went on a successful date. Tomorrow, I await the Four Horsemen, and Olivia Wilde's response to my wildly inappropriate marriage proposal. Because at this point, anything can happen.

***

Speaking of the Supreme Ruler of Jonathan's Happy Land, Olivia Wilde just completed a photo shoot for GQ. Consider my mind officially blown and my pants officially wet. There is a God.

Uh, hi...my name is...name....is...fuck....*twitches*

***

I know this is old news, but I do wonder what qualifies Ellen Degeneres as an American Idol judge. Its not because she's funny, because she isn't. She certainly can't dance, as she amply demonstrates whenever possible. Sing? Instrument? No? Is it because she likes girls? I like girls too. Where's my invite?

***

Saw an episode of "True Blood". Fucking Anne Rice-esque hype job. Androgynous pervy vampires were cutting edge about 20 years ago. The only thing to keep me watching is the prospect of Anna Paquin skin. But, that's what Tivo and Youtube are for.

***

Who in their right mind names their child "Sookie"? Were they expecting a puppy to pop out of that womb?

***

Can't wait for Modern Warfare 2. I need another game to suck the living substance off of my social life.

A Small World

With globalization, the notion that the world has become smaller has reached the level of tired cliche.

But, what does a small world really look like?

I would propose that the "small world" everybody talks about, the one wherein cultures on separate ends of various spectra come together, cannot be found in what our funny elites call "multiculturalism". Watching this phenomenon in the West, one gets the feeling that "multiculturalism" is just a shallow manifestation of this new smallness of the world. There is no authentic mingling of cultures when ethnic-specific parades come marching down Manhattan every month. There is nothing genuinely unifying about the artificial celebrations of, say, Philippine Independence Day in Toronto. If any, these occasions of ethnic and ideological chest-thumping illustrate the opposite irony of the "small world"; here you have an ethnic or ideological group living within a cultural melting pot erecting gaping barriers of ethnic or ideological culture and identity between them and the rest of the world around them. They make small blocks of living space seem continents apart.

A more genuine example of this new smallness of the world is the recent celebration of the feast day of Nuestra Señora de Peñafrancia in the Bicol region (among other places) of the Philippines. Here, we have a holy icon discovered by a Frenchman in Spain, one which a later devotee brought to the Philippines, where it is now one of the most venerated icons in the country. This is not some multicultural posturing handed down by over-eager social engineers, but a genuine co-mingling of different cultures. The fact that people on either end of the world can sincerely venerate the same icon (the same juxtaposition can be made with the Guadalupe icon) is a testament to a universality that has, indeed, made the miles between both ends seem meaningless.

Those who worship at the farcical altar of multiculturalism would denounce this phenomenon as "colonialism", the willful imposition of one cultural artifact over an unwilling foreign culture. However, take one look at the celebration. There is neither the equivalent of a hallowed recital of "White Man's Burden", nor a yearly smashing of symbols the Left seems so fond of (flag-burning, anyone?). These people take their worship seriously. One can also look at history and see that the banishment of all things Spanish Imperial does not coincide with a banishing of these icons. Our Lady belongs as much to the people of Bicol as She does to the people of Caceres. Such an understanding is rooted in a deeper meaning, one that resonates in a heart, whether it be Basque or Bicolano, Aztec or Castillan. As such, the distance becomes meaningless when the hearts of people on either end of the spectra resonate to the same music in the soul.

Now that is a small world.

 

Road Rules

Got invited last night to a technical run of ACASIA production "North Diversion Road", written by Tony Perez, at 6 Underground.

The run got cut short, which means that I missed the part that ties all the vignettes together. Which sucks, because I was looking forward to it. A waste of excellent performances thus far, but what can you do when the scheduling gods go against you. 

I hope all you guys watch it. I want somebody to tell me how it ends because my inopportunely unyielding bank account won't allow me to see another showing. 

Show dates are: September 18, 19, 23, 25, 26 and 30, and October 7, 9, 10, 14, 16 and 17. And if you can allow a hungry writer to bum a ticket, I'd be mighty obliged.

Never Speak Ill of The Crew

Megan Fox learns the hard way. But then again, I suspect all learning for that woman is via "the hard way".

Grammar in the letter's somewhat off, but then again, they're not exactly responding to Einstein, are they?

Random Thoughts on the Week at Large

Saw "Gamer" today, because my sister has this weird crush on Gerard Butler. Potentially good story, extremely weak ending, and the shaky-cam must. simply. die. Too many shots of creepy fat gay guy playing future Sims. Dexter makes a nice villain.

***

Another week, another agonizing moan for the Republic. Noynoy talks to dead people and they tell him to run. Administration's best bets are "opposition" candidates. (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge)  At least, "abstaining voter" is gonna be fun.

***

You know how the dying Roman Republic was replaced by the Roman Empire? If only we would be so fortunate once our own Republic dies. "Emperor" Noynoy just does not have the same ring as Augustus.

***

Rehearsals for "Newspaper Dance" are proceeding according to plan. Well, "plan" broadly defined, at least. A good thing too. My A team will be absent on two different months.

***

Oh, and cats do bring their prey home to serve a social function, either because they see their owners as head of their social groups and the dead mouse is some sort of tribute, or because they're teaching their dumb owners to hunt, or as part of their own parenting process (with the owner seen as an inept kitten or older cat, since there is no "parental separation" between a cat and the owner). I was right. I was not the one anthropomorphizing cats. Cats see the dead mice and birds as things good in themselves, my ass. (Yes, foundations classmates, I am a petty asshole.) Yeah, its Wikipedia, but the relevant part is sourced.

***

Speaking of Foundations class, the Disputatio was a pleasant and welcome surprise.

***

Band of Brothers remains the best war movie / tv show / anything to come out of Hollywood in the last 20 years. No pushy dove screeching, just straight up story-telling about the horrors and heroism of war.

***

Speaking of screeching doves, "liberal" is still a dirty word. "Reagan" is still awesome. 

***

Guns or God? Another Newsweek moron wants to know, because she says you can't have both. Unfortunately for her, God doesn't agree. Praise the Lord, pass the ammunition, indeed.

***

Never act like a credit card newbie in front of a cute bank teller. I fucking hate credit cards. I like cute bank tellers who giggle girlishly when Richard Cheese plays on the radio.

***

Are we supposed to suspend classes whenever famous people die? I would feel kinda stupid if we have a holiday when Kris Aquino kicks the bucket. But then again, I'd like a nice, happy drink on that day.

***

I'd like to stop being a moron when confronted with pretty women. But then again, I'd still like to be straight as well. Ah, the price we have to pay.

A Follow-Up 9/11 Post

In the spirit of never forgetting, let us not forget that, in the course of the life of the malicious Jihad, Christendom knew how to fight back.

September 11, 1565 - The Knights Hospitaller, badly outnumbered and outgunned, repulse the Turks from Malta, the last home of the Order. The last epic battle of Crusader Knights results in the first great defeat of the greatest Islamic empire in history.

This is Malta!!!!

September 11, 1683 - King Jan III Sobieski of Poland leads a relief force that crushes a massive Turkish army at the gates of Vienna, capital of the Hapsburg empire, utilizing the largest cavalry charge in recorded history. The defeat marks the last time the Turks would seriously threaten Western Europe.

Ride for ruin, and the world's ending....

The Islamic Jihad is not invincible.

Belated 9/11 post

The US is one of the last few places in the West wherein you see something like this:

A cross raised over a field of tragedy.

Slowly, as the West recedes into the horizon, we will come to appreciate the dwindling instances of hope (and I mean real Hope, not the snake oil peddled by the American black dude-in-chief) raised over the dark plains of mourning.

More Conventional Wisdom

According to this New York Times economist / columnist / professional moron, Chinese "democracy" is simply the best kind of democracy.

Oooo, look at China, about to overtake America in everything from electronic cars to dumpling production.

Ignore the slave labor and humans rights violations behind the curtain. They just get in the way of "efficiency". Even then, China's draconian population control has not made it all that "efficient". But, who's counting when it means that your guys would have all the power?

Another over-educated prick.

Abstaining Voter # 1

This is the inaugural post "Abstaining Voter", my special series of election blog posts. Why "Abstaining Voter"? Because I do not plan on settling for this bag of putrid mediocrity we call our "presidential candidates". So, I plan to register my dissatisfaction by voting with a strike-through on the ballot (or whatever else will be its equivalent once voting goes electronic).

In essence, "Abstaining Voter" will be about having fun with that putrid bag of mediocrity. It ought to be fun mocking these soulless individuals who believe they can lead us.

Now, I am not a follower of conventional wisdom. For example, I have been against Obama when being against Obama meant that people viewed you as some sort of cave troll. As such, my bias tends to skew against those candidates whom the greatest purveyors of conventional wisdom (the mainstream media) believe the people ought to vote for. Picking on the guy everybody in the newspapers hate is just way too easy. I refuse to be the Inquirer's lemming.

To celebrate the first post of this series, let me get the party started with a political ad.

No credentials...

No qualifications...

No achievements...

No skills...

No problem...

Vote for Corazon... Ninoy... Noynoy Aquino, 2010

Year One

Rating:	★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Comedy

Where's Mel Brooks When You Need Him?

So, yeah, I actually watched this movie. District 9 would have made me late for Sunday Mass, so yeah...

History of the World Volume... I mean... Year One is a crappy movie. Art direction? Cinematography? Screenwriting? These guys were absent when those were taught.

I only watched it for two reasons: Olivia Wilde and juvenile laughs.

The movie gets one star because Olivia Wilde was particularly fetching. (Such is my blind bias that I would utter the same sentence if she were dressed in a barrel and/or potato sack.) If that was her natural accent, then rrrooooowwwr. The movie gets an extra half star because there was potty humor all up to wazoo, but it got old about halfway in. There's only so much shit one can take from Jack Black, and Michael Cera should just go back and thank Arrested Development he still gets work these days.

As for the substance, you'd have better luck asking a crab-ridden whore her opinions on Shakespeare.

What Heroism Looks Like

Thanks to movies, TV, and pop culture in general, we have this vague notion of "hero" that, funnily enough, requires little heroism and more being "larger than life". (How else do you explain our lionizing of such inconsequential men?)

But heroism is not always larger than life, not always won on the battlefields one sees on CNN or ANC. Heroism begins in the heart, and manifests itself even in the smallest of places. My case in point is this story, about a couple in Texas who realize that their firstborn son had a rare genetic disorder called Trisomy 13. In the US, as in any industrialized Western country, the most common option for any unborn child born with genetic disorders is instant termination. But this couple, in true heroic fashion, was having none of it.

"Thomas was a miracle from the moment he was conceived," she told the congregation. "We are better because Thomas existed."

"The only thing he will know of this world is love."

I am reminded of all of those babies one sees in the local news channels. You know, the ones with enlarged heads or other birth defects, that have their mothers on screen asking for help. One tends to see them as victims of a cruel fate, but one must also realize the element of human will here. These parents are not just victims. They are also heroes. In a world that looks upon their children as "incompatible with life" (just ask the sponsors of that birth control bill), they took upon themselves to carry that heavy burden and ensure that all that their children will know of this world, though their lives be short, is love. And love stands at the very core of heroism, be it in the battlefield or in the home. Celebrity and being "larger than life" have nothing to do with it.

Proof that College Education Does Not Make You Smart

Harvard-educated multimillionaire Natalie Portman, she of franchise-ruining first trilogy of Star Wars fame, has declared, with queenly air, that the current economic recession is an "exciting time". Why, you ask? First, don't question the movie star! She knows more than you, pleb. And second, because:

I mean, everyone is cutting back. It's happening in every industry - including our own. All of a sudden, people are doing jobs that they hate and they're not making as much money as they thought they would or they've lost their jobs entirely. I've started to see people looking more toward their own passions and what really excites them.

Right. So, what does Marie Antionett-err... I mean, Natalie Portman do in this "exciting time"?

(My apologies to the late French queen.)

She buys a fucking castle worth $3 million. How's that recession working out for you, my lady?

I don't know. Maybe its the movie industry. Maybe its because she's so liberal she makes Ted Kennedy look like Ted Olson. But for some reason, that college education didn't seem to do her much good. So much for Harvard.

What Ms. Portman cannot see past her stupid-induced rose-colored goggles is that what these people are feeling is not passion. Its desperation. You will take one the most horrid jobs not because you are excited, but because you don't know where your next meal is coming from. If this fuels any sort of creativity, its the kind of creativity of which you would see, say, homeless people employ in order to snatch the other guy's stuff. It's the kind of creativity that allows people to think that bringing guns to health care demonstrations is the only means by which they will get a deaf-and-dumb president to listen to them.

Only a thick dunce won't be able to see that.

More proof that college education won't guarantee intelligence. What a waste of tuition. Damn movie stars....

Good luck with that, Natalie. Beauty pageant contestants have been trying for decades now.

 

Mar Roxas

Sell your soul to Noynoy, and for what?

I always knew this chump was a loser.

RIP Alexis Tioseco

You will be missed. Badly.

A dying industry will feel your loss.

Recquiscat in Pace, buddy.

One More Reason to Love Classical Music

It can be used to deter crime.

Apparently, classical music drives away hordes of would-be vandals and petty criminals, whose impoverished hearing palate can only handle simplistic drivel created by "artists" with names like "Flo Rida" (isn't that just Florida?), "Lil Wayne" (what happened to Big Wayne?), "Soulja Boy" (As in "Sister Souljah"?) and "Akon" (wtf?).

Maybe police choppers could play "Flight of the Valkyries" during car chases.

PS

What is with hip hop people and the inability to spell? Is American public education that bad? Why can't they all be like Kanye "Gay Fish" West? 

Barack Obama Will Not Save the Philippines

Oops, I mean, Noynoy Aquino will not save the Philippines.

This guy is Barack Obama without the advantageous skin pigmentation. Like America's current idiot-in-chief, Noynoy Aquino is very personable. He's got "charisma". He's got "temperament". He's (blech) "eloquent". And best of all, you have a national mainstream media willing to lick his balls and wipe them clean with the tattered remnants of its integrity at the drop of a dime. This is what qualifies as a "uniter" for our chattering classes, which goes to show how ill-educated our degreed chattering classes are.

Like Barack Hussein Obama, Noynoy Aquino lacks substance. He has little policy experience under his belt. He has little intellectual clout to wield. Worst of all, that thing which gives him widespread appeal is something utterly external to him. For BHO, it was his skin color. For Noynoy, it is the mere fact that he is the son of a beloved, recently-departed icon.

Aquino will not save us, simply because he cannot.

A man cannot give what he does not have.

What we need is a leader who is strong, yet flexible. We need someone who has both intellectual and technical clout, as well as the empathy to feel the wide-ranging impact of his decisions. We need someone with the strength of character to wield power and not be wielded by it.

Noynoy Aquino, a neophyte senator who was elected on the strength of his family name, has none of these traits.

Sure, you can argue that his mother, a modern-day Cincinnatus, did not have much experience. However, you must recall first, that character is not hereditary (even Cincinnatus' son paled in comparison to his father), and second, that by all standards, Corazon Aquino was a sub-par president. You must also take into account the fact that we are not fresh from revolution. We are trying to grow as a country. At this point, we do not need another Cincinnatus, but another Cicero.

If we hail Noynoy as our Messiah now the way a sizable chunk of American idiots made Obama theirs, we will experience a wide societal hang-over that may take decades to correct. Are we really going to follow this lightweight into the abyss?

One thing is for sure; if Noynoy is elected president, I will try to start a website called iamsorryivotedfornoynoy dot com.